7 Tips To Get Along Well With Your In-laws
Do you want some tips on how to deal with your in-laws? Then you’ve come to the right place! In today’s article you will find various tips on how to do that and what you should pay attention to.
No one just spontaneously appears on Earth. On the contrary, everyone is born of a father and mother. That’s why almost all of us have to deal with in-laws when we start a relationship.
They are probably a very important part of our partner’s life and that is why they deserve our respect. You should try to get along and get along with your in-laws as best you can.
the in-laws
A married couple consists of two people who each have their own family. It is normal that when you start a new relationship or a new family, your in-laws will also continue to participate to a greater or lesser extent in the lives of their children and their loved ones.
It’s completely normal and very common. Partners may even want their parents and in-laws to be a part of their lives and participate in activities to bring the family closer together. After all, the family always plays a fundamental role in our lives.
However, just because they are the parents doesn’t mean they have control over the lives of their children and the couple. However, if they are too involved, or not as involved as they should be, it can cause serious conflict.
Many in-laws are dissatisfied with their children’s partner and cause awkward situations with their comments or attitude. On the other hand, other members of the in-laws can be annoying meddling in everything and trying to get involved in strictly personal issues.
However, the son or daughter may feel uncomfortable if their partner doesn’t get along with his or her in-laws. So it is a two-sided problem. Therefore, you should ideally try to maintain a good relationship with them.
7 tips to deal with your in-laws
1. Respect
It’s not just about respecting your in-laws, but also about the respect your in-laws have for you. Indeed, your in-laws are often a very important part of your life as they are the parents of the person you have decided to share your life with.
That’s why you have to show respect for them. You do this by being careful with what you say, your attitude and the way you express your opinion. You should try to avoid conflict and misinterpretation.
If you think about it for a moment, they deserve that respect because they are your partner’s parents. Like it or not, the fact that they are your partner’s parents won’t change.
So you will always have a relationship with them. Also remember that if you hurt your in-laws or your in-laws, you hurt your partner in some way.
However, it’s just as important that they respect you. Once that’s the case and you’ve built a respectful relationship, it’s important to identify what you want from the relationship and do your part to make it happen.
2. Don’t make comparisons
Everyone raises his or her children in accordance with their norms, values and circumstances. It is of secondary importance whether one way is better than the other. Every father and mother is a unique person and has raised his or her children in a certain way.
Your parents will definitely be different from your partner’s and you’re both raised differently. So you got a different upbringing. You should therefore not critically compare the parenting style of your parents with that of your partner.
Just because they weren’t the same doesn’t mean one is better than the other, nor that your parents were better educators than your partner’s.
Every parent raises their children in the best possible way given their circumstances in life. Therefore, it is better to choose the path of understanding and compassion and avoid negative comparisons. Keep the credit to yourself.
3. Strive for harmony to get along well with your in-laws
A bad relationship with your in-laws always has consequences for your partner. This is independent of the relationship they have with your partner. Even if they are in a bad relationship, it will cause stress and discomfort.
For this reason, you often have to give in in situations for the good of your relationship and to maintain harmony. This does not apply if your in-laws’ attitude is really unacceptable.
Indeed, a relationship takes effort and dedication. Sometimes you have to make certain concessions to get along well with your in-laws by ensuring that balance and serenity prevail.
4. Set and monitor boundaries
We mentioned earlier that it is important to make certain concessions. However, everything has a limit, and you need to set clear boundaries to get along well with your in-laws, maintain a healthy relationship, and avoid problems.
So keep in mind that a relationship requires two people and that is the members of the relationship itself. Your in-laws have no decision-making power over your life. Their opinion may be more or less welcome if you ask, but the couple should make the decisions themselves.
In fact, in some cases you have to set limits. That way you prevent your in-laws from feeling that they can increasingly interfere in your decisions and your life. Of course, you should always set these boundaries with respect and good communication.
5. Get to know your in-laws
It’s hard to empathize, understand, or build a good relationship with someone you don’t know. In that sense, it’s unfair to label someone as “father-in-law” or “mother-in-law” without getting to know them first.
For this, there is nothing better than maintaining good communication with them, asking about their lives, their hobbies and tastes, etc. Only when you know each other better, you can build a healthy relationship and get along well with your in-laws.
Then, if a conflict threatens to arise, know how to avoid arguing or face the problem and resolve it without hurting anyone.
6. Talk to your partner
If there is something in your relationship with your parents that bothers you, it is best to discuss it calmly with your partner. Of course, you should always do this with respect and sensitivity.
That way you can talk openly with each other and come to an agreement on how to get along well with your in-laws as a couple. You can also solve problems before they become too big.
Good communication with your partner is therefore always essential. It will not only help you overcome discomfort and be more honest with each other. It will also form an ideal basis for setting healthy boundaries with regard to your in-laws. Remember: it takes two people to form a couple.
Both parties must make an effort to build a relationship and a new family. So it is important that you agree on certain things and about the relationship you are going to have with your in-laws and its limits.
7. Keep a healthy distance from your in-laws
The only way you can maintain your relationship, intimacy, and bond without undue pressure or intervention from your in-laws is to maintain a healthy distance.
Occasional dining out, occasional visits, and other sporadic activities are indeed very healthy and almost necessary for getting along well with your in-laws. However, everything has a limit and in-laws shouldn’t invade a couple’s life all the time.
This is especially important if you have children. Many in-laws, consciously or unconsciously, have a tendency to invade your home and your life. This is especially true when grandchildren are born. In addition, many parents, based on their experience and age, may even criticize or tell you how to raise your children.
However, young children need direct guidance from their own parents. Grandparents are always welcome, of course, but you should limit their involvement, opinion, and decision-making power. After all, they are your children!
In short, the best way to get on well with your in-laws is to get to know them. This way you can empathize with their characters and situation and maintain good communication.
From there, you can set certain boundaries based on respect and in favor of family harmony to allow for a truly healthy relationship and to interact with your in-laws in a pleasant and good way.
