Siblings: A Heart Bond
Although siblings fight for their parents’ attention, as they mature, they put their differences aside, support and care for each other.
The relationship between siblings can get quite complicated at times. After all, there are differences and years of envy and childhood quarrels between them. Ultimately, however, when they reach adulthood, they are usually reborn and experience the power that this heart bond can offer them.
According to a study conducted by the Institute of Personality and Social Research at the University of California, Berkeley, the order in which siblings are born is generally very important.
As children, we all have to use certain strategies to get our parents’ attention. However, once siblings grow up, they usually put aside their past differences and start taking care of each other.
The bond between siblings is a special bond that you cannot choose. These people are connected by the blood that flows through their bodies and everyday life creates a bond that transcends time, generations and age.
Siblings are also quite determinative of each other’s identities and our siblings are also the ones who support us in difficult times.
So let’s take a look at this.
The bond between siblings and the importance of birth order
It always surprises me to hear how many studies have been done from a psychological perspective looking at the importance of birth order.
Older siblings
Evolutionary psychologist Frank J. Sulloway, who works at the University of California, Berkeley, describes in his book “ Born to Rebel ‘ which older siblings certain characteristics which many individuals can identify with.
- They tend to be more responsible and better able to accept changes within the family.
- Older siblings are often the ones who confront their parents when something is unfair.
- It is also often said that older siblings receive more values from their parents, while younger siblings are treated with more leniency and fewer rules.
- This will sometimes cause the oldest child to accept these values or do the opposite and thus rebel against them.
The middle child
It is often ironically said that the middle child is in “no man’s land.” They are looking for their place within the family and therefore they often demand attention. Usually dislike a hierarchy and will rebel against things they perceive as unjust.
They then try:
- Something to excel at.
- To be smarter than their older siblings.
- To be more agile than their younger siblings.
Studies show that middle children will always try to build a personal and emotional relationship where they are cared for and where both partners are clearly equals and there is no dominance or superior behavior.
Strangely enough, pop culture says that after the first responsible child, there is always a rebellious sibling. Of course, this kind of statement or study is not fixed for anyone. There are undoubtedly many differences between different families.
The youngest child
According to the book ‘ Ties that Last Forever ‘ written by Jurg Frick, the youngest child can show two very different extremes.
- They can become the independent child who has a very strong character and leaves the house as early as possible.
- They can become little boys and girls who are even more dependent on their parents and brothers.
You can say that the youngest child will always have to live with the title of ‘the smallest in the house’.
Siblings: A Conflicting Yet Very Powerful Relationship
So let’s not talk about birth order anymore. Everyone knows that during childhood and adolescence, children are constantly fighting to establish their position within the family.
Jealousy begins to rear its head, along with bouts of confrontation and extremely complicated situations that, in some ways, stay with us forever.
Siblings help each other to socialize
This early situation helps us learn to:
- To share.
- Dealing with intense feelings such as anger and envy.
- Putting ourselves in someone else’s shoes to develop empathy.
There is someone with whom you can share that conflicting relationship
Between many siblings, their relationship always remains complicated: your personality may not match your sibling’s ideas, values, and passions.
However, the bond between siblings is usually much stronger than the differences that exist between them
This blood bond and the bond born of past moments together make siblings:
- Always stay together.
- Rejoice when they see each other again.
- That the camaraderie of their youth is always reborn.
The love that was formed during their childhood continues into adulthood.
Our brothers and sisters are a source of unity and balance that will always remain with us. We all have our own differences, our own craziness and responsibilities.
However, siblings share certain traits with each other and sometimes they even laugh in the same way. And while they may have chosen different paths, they will always meet at the same intersection: love.