Mothers, Let Your Instincts Guide You In Parenting

Who has never felt the fear of not being a good mother? It’s normal to ask yourself these kinds of questions, but don’t worry too much. Your instinct will always answer you.

Countless books have been written on this subject. And many experts can offer you more certainty if you are unsure about how to raise your child. But… think about this. How did our grandmothers do that when all this information didn’t exist yet? The answer is simple: they just followed their instincts.

The wisdom of nature

Nature is wise. If you listen to your instincts, you will have no doubts about what to do. But societal beliefs and taboos have influenced the value of all these instincts.

Pause here for a moment. When a baby cries, what is your first reaction? Will you ignore the baby or comfort him?

It is true that a crying baby can be very annoying, but this crying has a purpose. And no, we are not talking here about whether the baby suffers from an upset stomach or from gas.

We do refer to the fact that a child sometimes feels lonely or has an uneasy feeling about something. They may be small, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t aware of what’s going on around them.

Your instinct is wise, but your head is overflowing with the tips and good advice your friends, relatives or books give you. For example, some people claim that if you go directly to your child as soon as he cries, the child will not learn to delay satisfying his desires. Or it would mean that the child is trying to manipulate you.

You may just have to follow your instincts while acknowledging that your child is seeing and experiencing something that you can’t, thanks to all that clutter in your head.

Mothers are slaves to the clock

Is it true that mothers just “know” that they should breastfeed their child approximately every three hours? And who decided that this is the way to breastfeed children?

Children are not given the freedom to claim the need to feed themselves. After all, we eat at certain times, even if we are not hungry. Wouldn’t it be easier if we let our children eat when they are hungry?

Without realizing it you can become a slave to a fixed schedule. But it really doesn’t have to be that way. What happens if your child cries outside this schedule because he is hungry? It will take a real effort not to give in to this, but this will also put an end to your instincts.

You get a lot of information. However, that does not mean that you should just accept all that data as absolute truth. Every case is different. It is very difficult to let go of an ingrained belief. Still, this is important if you choose to listen to your instincts. Those instincts are very wise.

Your instinct knows no guidelines

Instinct doesn’t take into account the beliefs we’ve been talking about. There are even more of those ideas. Animals in nature, for example, do it completely differently.

For example, many people recommend that you stop the habit of letting your child sleep with you. They think it is better that you put your child in his crib. They also have an explanation for this: if you always hold your child in your arms, it will get too used to this.

All this advice stops us from doing what we are born with. If you no longer have contact or touch with your child, your child will notice this.

The way mothers show their love knows no boundaries or rules. Don’t put any restrictions on yourself. Don’t suppress your instincts. After all, none of what you were told is universally true.

There is a way to get rid of all those beliefs: think about what you liked or didn’t like as a child for your own parents to do. This will help you be a little more guided by your instincts.

The pitfall here is of course that you go to the other extreme. Don’t do this because as you know you can cause the same damage.

Look inside yourself. Follow your instincts. Do not hold back and show your child your love by hugging, by a lot of physical contact and by giving your child attention and care. Do this as much as you want.